VENT

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So far I’m not exactly enjoying this pregnancy. With my first, I really didn’t find it too difficult to control my sugars, especially in the beginning. I had no nausea, no stomach trouble, I wasn’t all that tired, I was motivated, I was ready to kick ass. Pregnancy suited me. And I wore it proudly, with a smile on my face.

Life ain’t so peachy with this one…..The other day my husband told me I’m hurting his heart a little because every morning I get up and I look miserable. He asked if I could try smiling and say “good morning” to him once in a while. LOL. I have been totally neglectful. Pain and tiredness does that.  I feel like all I’m thinking about lately are my blood sugars. I’m obsessed. But also sick of it. I want to be lazy, I want to eat whatever and not stress about it. I don’t want to check my sugar one hour after eating and then stress over the number. I don’t want all these lows. I don’t want to eat on such a strict schedule and so at times I’m sinking, I’m backsliding, which stresses me even more so then I get back on the horse. But my sugars have been more unpredictable, I feel I have less control and its eating at me.  I’m super tired, my stomach is a disaster. (No nausea though, haha. I keep saying, “at least I’m not puking!”) I have a history of tummy ulcers, all my stress goes right to my stomach, so I’m almost always on an acid reducer. Its been so painful lately that I have to sleep sitting up on the couch, I burp all the time, I can’t eat certain things and sometimes just drinking water hurts my stomach. It takes away my focus, makes me not want to be touched, I’m more irritable. All because of this stupid stomach pain. I started on zantac, no relief at all. Prevacid, nothing. So will talk with OB and hopefully get a script for some relief.

To be fair, I have a toddler, so I’m kinda at the mercy of her schedule. Of course I’m tired. I have more going on in my life now than I did back then, so its a little harder to juggle. I’ve felt so nasty that its harder to exercise. *sigh* Stay positive, stay positive!